


Plan B (Seduce Stiles)

by Humphrey



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Fluff, Game of Thrones References, Multi, POV Derek, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-23
Updated: 2013-08-23
Packaged: 2017-12-24 09:47:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/938511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Humphrey/pseuds/Humphrey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Derek is very happy in his relationship with Allison: sex without any complications. He is not so happy when she breaks up with him because she has found the perfect boyfriend, Stiles Stilinski. That’s how Plan B starts or how Derek seduces Stiles to get Allison back. It’s not exactly a foolproof plan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Plan B (Seduce Stiles)

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is vaguely inspired by the movie Plan B with the same premise.

Allison is zipping up her pants when she tells Derek that they need to stop seeing each other.

“What? Why not?” Derek asks. It’s not like they have some epic love affair going on, but they have been hooking up for the past six months and Derek actually likes her.

“I’ve been seeing this guy and at first I thought he was a bit too much for me, but I don’t know. He grows on you, I guess. I really like him and I think it’s time for me to commit.”

“Commit,” Derek scoffs at the suggestion. “Are you insane? Why would you ever want to do that? I don’t see why things have to change, even with this new guy.”

“I can’t commit and still sleep with someone else,” Allison explains. “I want to be a good girlfriend for Stiles, he deserves one.”

“Stiles, what is a Stiles? That can’t possibly be his name!”

“It’s a nickname and his full name is Stiles Stilinski. But don’t worry, you’ll find out his real name at our wedding,” she jokes. “I have to go now, but this was really nice. Seriously, you’ll always have the award for hottest hook-up,” Allison reassures him. She gives Derek one last kiss and walks out.

Derek picks up his phone and says, “Isaac, what do you know about Stiles Stilinski?”

\-----

It turns out that Isaac does know a Stiles Stilinski. Fortunately for Derek, it’s a name people don’t easily forget writing on a coffee cup and Isaac tells him that Stiles orders a coffee at his place every day. Tracking down Stiles may be easy, but Derek has no idea how to approach him. He can hardly go up and ask him to break up with Allison so Derek can have his easy hook-up back. No, he needs a plan and he knows exactly the right person to help him formulate one.

Erica looks at him with judgmental eyes when Derek first explains his situation.

“Basically you want to break up Allison and Stiles so she'll hook up with you again? Wow, Derek, that does not make you sound like a douchebag at all,” she says, while she finishes manicuring her already perfect nails.

“But,” she eventually continues, “I understand how difficult it must be for you to lose what in your completely emotionally repressed life, must be considered a relationship. And since you are my friend, I will help you.”

Derek replies, “Thank you, Erica. So what devious plan have you concocted?”

“Obviously Plan A is that I seduce Stiles, he cheats on Allison which leads to their tragic break up and to Allison crying in your incredibly strong arms. Unfortunately, Plan A is a no-go.”

“Why?”

She starts waving her sharp nails incredibly close to his face and glares. “Do you even remember getting the invitation to my wedding?”

“Right, you’re engaged, it keeps slipping my mind.” Derek tries to look as apologetic as possible.

“Well, you’re not going to win any best friend awards any time soon but luckily for you, we have all accepted your inner asshole and love you anyway. Whatever, that leaves us with Plan B.”

“And what is Plan B?”

“Plan B is that you’re the one who seduces Stiles,” she announces triumphantly.

“What! I’m not going to seduce Stiles! He’s not even gay and neither am I,” Derek responds outraged.

“First of all, my plan is amazing which leads me to my next point. How could you possibly know anything about Stiles’ sexuality, you don’t know anything about him and that needs to change.  Finally, you are not honestly going to tell me that it would be the first time that you hooked up with a guy.”

She adds, “And Isaac already informed me that you were asking questions about someone called Stiles and it just so happens that Boyd is friends with some guy called Danny and apparently he had ‘a thing’ with Stiles. Which means Stiles is flexible, you will sleep with anything that moves and poor Allison is going to get her heart broken.”

Derek remains doubtful of Erica’s sanity but eventually agrees. “Hmm, it’s a bit extreme but it could work. Allison is not the cheating type and I would be doing her a favor if Stiles is.”

“You’re welcome,” Erica replies and she puts her diamond ring on again.  “I hope you realize how many karma points I’m sacrificing here. If this works, my dress is probably going to rip while I’m busy walking down the aisle and I’ll have to marry Boyd in my underwear.”

“It would be the least boring wedding I ever went to.”

\-----

Derek has no idea how you seduce a Stiles, but talking to him seems like a good start so he goes to Isaac’s coffee shop on Thursday. When he orders his coffee, Isaac points out Stiles and Derek finally gets the chance to check out the guy that Allison dumped him for.

Derek is not particularly vain, but he does know that he looks pretty good and most people seem to agree with him. Watching Stiles doesn’t really help him understand why he is the one that got dumped. He is cute, but not exactly the type to turn heads on the street. He must have an amazing personality.

He stands at the table next to Stiles and tries to spot which website he is visiting. It appears that Stiles is a huge Game of Thrones fan, since he just logged on to some sort of fansite. Derek doesn’t watch a lot of tv. But his sister sometimes forces him to watch marathons of her favorite shows with her ‘to bond as a family’ now that she is living out of town. Coincidentally, Game of Thrones is one of them so it looks like Derek has his opening.

He coughs to get Stiles’ attention. “I’m sorry to interrupt, but I couldn’t help but wonder if you’re a Stark fan or a Lannister fan? You look like a Stark fan to me.”

Stiles laughs and says, “I’m definitely a Stark fan, who doesn’t root for the fierce Arya. Also, do you always spy on other people’s computers, mysterious stranger?”

Derek realizes that he does come off as slightly stalkerish and immediately apologizes. “I’m sorry, I’m just a big fan of the show but none of my friends watch it so I couldn’t resist talking to someone who seems to be a big fan.”

“Ah, I understand, I’ve got lame friends as well. The name is Stiles by the way, and before you ask that is my legal name.” He nods at Derek to sit down at his table.

“Nice to meet you, Stiles. I’m Derek,” he says.  “This may sound a bit fast, but do you want to watch the next episode at my apartment. It’s just nice to finally find someone who loves this show as much as I do. “

“Um, why don’t you buy me a coffee first so I can make sure you’re not some kind of Hannibal wannabe,” Stiles suggests.

“Great and you can always ask Isaac about me, he’s one of my best friends and you do trust the man who brings you coffee, right?”

“Of course, he keeps me alive,” Stiles grins and he looks so full of life that Derek is actually starting to understand Allison a bit more.

\-----

Derek discovers that Stiles isn’t just Allison’s boyfriend and a huge Game of Thrones fan, he is also a web designer, addicted to coffee, he loves dogs and he talks a lot. Keeping up with Stiles is quite challenging for Derek who is used to just nodding when his girlfriends talk to him. But his plan requires that he gets to know Stiles and for some reason he doesn’t even mind paying attention to Stiles’ ramblings. He even manages to make Derek smile, which is a miracle in itself. The only people who can make Derek laugh are his mother and sister, which is quite depressing. He barely even knows Stiles and he already feels comfortable with him.

Although it’s a relief that he actually likes Stiles, otherwise his plan would be a lot more unpleasant, but he has to stay careful that he doesn’t like him too much.

\-----

“I have a problem,” is the first thing Derek says when Erica picks up her phone.

“There is no plan C, Derek,” Erica warns.

“Plan B is working, it’s just working a bit too well. Stiles is actually a nice guy and I wouldn’t even mind being,” Derek hesitates but says it anyway, “friends.”

“I am so glad that I’m sitting down right now, because this is a brand new phone and I really don’t want it to fall on the floor. Derek, you don’t make friends,” she says determinedly. “The only reason that I am your friend is because I practically forced you to.”

“You were very determined,” Derek recalls, but he does want to prove her wrong. “But I did become friends with Isaac on my own, and he was not nearly as determined as you. ”

“No, Isaac just looked at you like he was a beaten puppy and even someone with a cold heart like you, couldn’t say no to him. This Stiles must be pretty special if you’re willing to make the first move,” she says suggestively.

“I’m supposed to make a move,” Derek reminds her. “This whole plan is based on the fact that I seduce Stiles.”

“Well then get to it. Just treat him like one of your regular hook-ups, unless that’s a problem?” she asks.

“Of course not, we’re meeting up tonight to watch the season finale of Game of Thrones, I’ll make my move then,” Derek informs her.

“Very smooth, I can see how you get laid so often. And remember to be careful.”

“I don’t think we’ll need condoms, I’m not planning on taking it that far.”

“I wasn’t taking about condoms, Derek,” she sighs.

\-----

“That was like super awesome! I know you haven’t read the books, which you totally should do by the way because they're amazing, but that was like even better than what I hoped for,” Stiles says, talking at warp speed.

“I really liked it too,” Derek calmly replies.

Stiles laughs at him. “I know I sometimes get a bit too overexcited but what does it take to get you excited? You could win the lottery tomorrow and you’d just say ‘this is really nice’,” Stiles says, doing an awful imitation of Derek. At least Derek hopes that it’s awful because he really doesn’t want to sound that grumpy.

“Don’t worry, Derek, I have accepted a long time ago that you have the mind of a really old man locked up in an incredibly hot body.” This time, even Stiles seems surprised about what just came out of his mouth. “Not that you need me to tell you that you’re hot, even old guys own a mirror. Sorry, my girlfriend gave me a lecture yesterday about trying to control my mouth and I am honestly trying. I guess it’s the curse of being with Stiles Stilinski, there is a lot of talking involved.”

“I don’t mind being with Stiles Stilinski, you’re a good friend. And you make me laugh which is rare,” Derek tells him.

Stiles looks flattered. “I make _you_ laugh? Maybe I should give up on my career and become a stand-up comedian after all.”

“Please don’t, I’m pretty sure I’m an isolated case.”

They’re laughing and Derek knows this is the exact moment he was waiting for but he finds it surprisingly hard to cross that bridge and kiss Stiles. Because he actually wants to kiss Stiles and not just because it’s a part of Plan B.

But he doesn’t need to worry because suddenly they’re kissing anyway. It’s been a long time since Derek has been turned on just from kissing someone, but kissing Stiles does the job. At first, Stiles is in control of their kiss but Derek quickly takes over and basically pushes him into the couch. He could spend hours kissing Stiles so it’s very disappointing when he suddenly pushes him back.

“I’m sorry,” Stiles stammers, looking quite disheveled, his hair is a complete mess.

“I have no idea what just happened, but I have a girlfriend. And I realize that you don’t know Allison but she’s a really nice girl and I can’t do this to her. God, I’m such a horrible person, I don’t even know what I’m doing. We’ve been seeing each other for like three months, which doesn’t quite make us lifelong partners. But I am her boyfriend and I shouldn’t be kissing other guys, no matter how much I want to.”

And that is of course the moment Derek is supposed to say ‘maybe you should break up with Allison’. But he can’t get his lips to form the words. The only thing his lips seem to be interested in, is going back to kissing Stiles.

Stiles seems to interpret Derek’s silence as his cue to leave and he puts his jacket back on.

“I think it’s best that we don’t see each other anymore. Which sucks, because you’re an awesome friend and I don’t have a lot of those. But first, I have to confess this to Allison and beg her for forgiveness.”

Derek finally murmurs, “Don’t say anything to Allison.”

Which is of course the complete opposite of what Plan B requires him to say. But screw plan B, right now he just wants Stiles to not look that miserable anymore.

“I have to,” Stiles whispers and then he really leaves. Derek doesn’t expect to ever see him again.

\-----

Derek knows that Allison isn’t an idiot but it still surprises him that it only takes one day to hear someone knocking the shit out of his door. He remembers that Allison is a master with the bow and silently prays that she left her toys at home.

When he reluctantly opens the door, he sees an absolutely furious Allison, but fortunately one without a bow.

“What the fuck, Derek, how could you do this!” She punches him surprisingly hard in the chest.

“Stiles is devastated and you’ve officially made me an asshole!” she yells, loud enough that Derek is going to get complaints from his neighbors.

“Wait, how does what I did make _you_ an asshole?” he asks, feeling confused about this outburst.

“Because when Stiles came to my apartment this morning, very emotional, without even drinking coffee, I was actually planning on breaking up with him.”

“You were going to break up with Stiles?” Derek doesn’t understand why anyone would want to break up with him.

“Not because I don’t like him, because he’s a great guy. Like you’ve probably discovered yourself.” Her eyes turn incredibly dark. “And he is a great boyfriend, it’s just that I’m like madly in love with Scott who also happens to be his best friend and Scott is also in love with me. But of course I can’t tell him that now since he feels so incredibly guilty about kissing you.”

“Wow, you are an asshole,” Derek declares.

“Thanks, Derek, that means a lot coming from the champion of assholes. You know, I was very surprised when Stiles told me he kissed another guy, but when he mentioned your name, it all suddenly made sense. I don’t even understand why you went to all this trouble, it’s not like we even liked each other that much.”

“I did like you and you were safe. I guess I’m just sick of looking for hook-ups,” Derek shrugs.

“Then get yourself a girlfriend or a boyfriend, but you can’t steal mine!” Allison yells.

“You don’t even want him anymore!” Derek yells back.

“But you didn’t know that!” She takes a deep breath and says, “This is pointless, I should just go. I have to explain everything to Stiles.”

“Everything?” Derek asks uncertainly.

“Everything,” Allison confirms. “I wonder who he’s going to hate more: you or me.”

\-----

Derek doesn’t hear anything from Allison or Stiles which is not exactly shocking news. He guesses that a small part of him still hoped that Stiles could forgive him.

Luckily, he is distracted by his sister who’s staying with him this weekend. Derek is actually looking forward to one of her marathons. As long as it’s not Game of Thrones.

But since karma is a bitch, Laura enters his apartment and immediately says, “I cannot believe that my little brother is such a jerk. This is not how you were raised, Derek.” She sounds disturbingly like their mother.

“How could you possibly know about that?” he demands.

“Please, I have my sources and apparently my sources are very influential. I always knew it would pay off to be in a sorority, that is where I met Lydia. And Lydia happens to be dating Jackson, who is friends with Danny, who is friends with, and you may recognize this name, Stiles Stilinski. Danny told his good friend Jackson how devastated Stiles is, because he was apparently dumped by his girlfriend for his best friend and the guy he liked, Derek Hale, turned out to be playing a cruel joke on him. Start explaining, Derek.”

Derek knows this is only the beginning of his interrogation. “Okay, Allison was kind of my girlfriend..”

Laura just stares at him.

“Ok, we were sleeping together and then suddenly she dumped me for Stiles and I didn’t want to lose her and then Erica suggested…”

That makes Laura even more furious. “Erica is involved in this! Well, that’s another idiot I will have to deal it. I have warned her about suggesting plans to you. In the future, talk to me about these things.”

“Yes, sir,” he answers.

“Good, and before you explain the rest of this incredible mess to me, you can tell me how you are going to fix it,” she orders.  

“Fix it?” Derek asks, a bit stunned.

“I’ve only just discovered that my little brother is an idiot, I really hope that you’re not a coward as well. What are you going to say to Stiles?”

“Stiles will never talk to me again,” Derek scoffs.

“It’s not like you’ve tried very hard, is it? Even if he doesn’t want to talk you, which is quite understandable, you could at least try to explain your questionable motivations.”

“You’re probably right,” he admits.

“You can drop that probably. I can also tell you that your punishment starts right now, I’m going to freshen up quickly and then I’ll put in the first season of Sex and the City. If we start now, we can watch all six seasons, doesn’t that sound like fun?” she asks cruelly.

Derek is just glad that he survived their confrontation. If his mother is informed, he might not be that lucky.

\-----

Watching all Carrie’s troubles with men, does give him the opportunity to think about what he is going to say Stiles. Unfortunately, he doesn’t have any epiphanies and when he stands in front of Stiles’ door, he has no idea what to say. He knocks anyway and is relieved when Stiles opens the door.

“What are you doing here, Derek?” he asks curtly, which is so unlike Stiles that Derek feels even worse.

“I’ve come to apologize and explain why I did such a terrible thing,” Derek says.

“You know what, however satisfying it might feel to throw the door in your face, I actually want to hear this. Come inside, but don’t expect to stay too long. Keeping it short shouldn’t be a problem for you.”

“I know you think this all about Allison, but it isn’t,” Derek starts. “Well, it may have started that way, she’s the reason that I approached you in the first place. But this stopped being about Allison, when I got to know you.”

Stiles stays completely silent so Derek doesn’t have a choice but keep talking.

“I liked sleeping with Allison, but I really like you. I like spending time with you, I like talking to you and I really liked kissing you. And I didn’t kiss you because it was part of some ridiculous plan, I just wanted to and I still do. But right now, I can only hope that there will a day when you don’t hate me anymore."

“I don’t hate you, Derek,” Stiles sighs. “Honestly, what you did was shitty but I’m a bit preoccupied making voodoo dolls of my former best friend. I just don’t understand why no one feels like they can tell me the truth.” He sounds even more depressed.

“But, I will probably be Scott’s best man at their wedding anyway, because life is too short to hold grudges and shockingly I’m the grown-up in this quadrangle of messed up people.  I hope you understand that I’m not exactly in the mood to kiss or hug right now. I can forgive you, but that doesn’t mean that you’re not still an asshole.”

“I get it, but maybe you could call me if you ever want to grab a coffee again,” Derek carefully suggests.

“We’ll see,” Stiles says eventually.

\-----

Three weeks later, Stiles still hasn’t called him. Derek makes an effort to stay away from Isaac’s coffee shop, he should really avoid stalking Stiles. Although it’s tempting. Derek was never aware that you could miss someone this much. He hasn’t even known Stiles that long, it’s completely illogical. Even if Stiles doesn’t want to date him, Derek remains determined to become friends with him again. He has led a Stiles-free life for the past 28 years and he doesn’t really look forward to go back to that life.

Derek can’t help but look for an old lady when he crosses the street, he could use the karma. He doesn’t find an old lady but he does bump into Stiles, who looks a lot more cheerful since the last time Derek saw him.

“Derek, this is quite a surprise.” Stiles doesn’t lose his cheerful demeanor when he talks to Derek. He gives him a very uncharacteristic wide smile back.

“I was actually going to grab a coffee, care to join me?” he asks boldly.

“Hmm, why not,” Stiles answers carefully. “I was in the mood for coffee anyway and I’m sure you know a fancy place where you can buy me one.”

“I do, actually.”

Derek takes Stiles to one of his favorite places in the city, Stiles seems to like the cosy atmosphere as much as he does. He is amused to see Stiles’ shocked face when he greets his mother.

“That’s your mom,” Stiles not so subtly whispers, “you could have warned me. This is totally a mom ambush.”

“I’m sorry,” Derek whispers, “but I needed to bring out my best weapon, I am fighting for something really important to me.”

Stiles actually looks charmed and then Derek’s mom decides to interrupt their not so private conversation.

“Hello, son. I hope I’m not being too curious but who is this boy you’re whispering with?”

“My name is Stiles Stilinski, Mrs. Hale.”

“Well Stiles Stilinski, you can sit down at the table in the corner, I’ll be right there to bring you the best coffee you can find in this city.”

“I must warn you, Mrs. Hale. I’m not some poor coffee novice, I have drunk a lot of coffee, served by a lot of beautiful women like yourself. It’s not easy to dazzle me.”

“Prepare to be dazzled anyway.  Now please go sit down. My son is desperate to go back to staring into your pretty eyes.”

“Mom,” Derek replies scandalized.

\-----

Derek really does love his mother, because it’s only a few days later that Stiles calls him back and invites him to grab another cup of ‘that magical coffee.’

Even though they start having regular coffee dates, Derek is still a bit too intimidated to ask Stiles out on a proper date. To his great relief he doesn’t need to, because Stiles is the one who asks him to have dinner together.

Derek isn’t the only lucky one, Stiles is back to being friends with Scott. Although things are still a bit awkward since Allison still hates Derek, and Stiles isn’t really comfortable with Allison either. But they do eventually meet up at Erica and Boyd’s wedding, which goes off without a hitch.

Derek is busy grabbing a new wine bottle when Allison approaches him.

“Derek, I know that you are dating Stiles, which is extremely bizarre, but I really need us to get along. For the sake of our boyfriends who love each other very much.”

“It depends on you, Allison. Can you forgive me for my plan B?” Derek asks.

“Of course I can. I don’t even think I was ever really that mad at you, I think I was jealous. Trust me, the idea of your ex-boyfriends falling for each other is not exactly pleasant.”

“I can understand that.”

“But I hope from now on, we can all become friends and eventually have our own very special double wedding.”

“Sounds like a plan to me,” Derek grins.

\-----

When Stiles insists on a Game of Thrones theme, their double wedding is officially off.

But they all live happily ever after anyway. And fortunately long enough that Stiles can finally discover who sits on that damn Iron Throne.


End file.
